Retirements Grief
Need a lifeline? We’re here for you. Visit WAEPA.org.
The prompt for this round of the FEDforum is ongoing operations. This week, hear from the Federal Law Enforcement Officers Association (FLEOA).
The seasons are changing for many, and for some your careers are changing. How many times have you heard during your career, ‘how long ‘till you can retire’? You spout off the time and relish in thought of what you will do when that day comes. Now it’s here – what the heck do you do? You checked your Thrift Savings Plan (TSP) over and over so you financially prepared, but what about your mental health equivalent of your TSP? Now it gets closer to that retirement date, and you are sorting your feeling, some of which you can’t name. The best you can come up with is melancholy.
That is also referred to as anticipatory grief. Many of us have experienced anticipatory grief without realizing there’s a name for it. Any kind of looming change can bring on anticipatory grief. This is true even if the change is exciting and chosen.
A person who puts in notice at his/her job may grieve the loss of friendships and routine lifestyle, however, when a law enforcement officer, leaves active duty the difficulty can be exacerbated by the loss of the strong camaraderie that has been developed over the years.
There will be a point when you must be prepared to become a civilian. This shift and loss of police power may initiate feelings of loss of identity. You have lived a certain way for so many years, flipping a switch to shut off the last 25 years is not an option. During your tenure, you became occupationally and personally socialized into approaching situations looking through ‘cops eyes’ and having a heightened level of vigilance with additional distrust, suspicion and anxiety.
Many retirees experience the five stages of grief. The stages are (1) Denial, (2) Anger, (3) Bargaining, (4) Depression, and (5) Acceptance. These stages are normal when you are grieving loss, and even when your loss is your career.
Here are a few suggestions to help you through your stages:
Find and redefine your purpose.
Learn tools to help off-set any anxiety that has set in.
Maintain and reconnect with family and friends.
Volunteer and help others.
Enjoy a hobby or something that has meaning.
Write articles using your experience and expertise.
Find a secondary career.
Teach at the academy or a local college.
Most people think that transitioning from active-duty law enforcement to retirement should be stress free. While it is a tremendous feeling of accomplishment, it should be actively approached in a way to ensure a healthy transition.
This article was produced by the FLEOA Office of Mental Health and Peer Support Services and republished for the FEDagent FEDforum. Minor edits have been made to meet our editorial standards.
This column from the Federal Law Enforcement Officers Association (FLEOA) is part of the FEDforum, an initiative to unite voices across the federal community. The FEDforum is a space for federal employee and law enforcement groups to share their organizations’ initiatives and activities with the FEDagent audience.
Be sure to subscribe to FEDagent so you never miss an update!